Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Bi the Way...

These 3 small words can have so much weight to them and to finally open up and say these words openly and publicly, feels so relieving… I am Bisexual. 

"Bisexuality is an orientation, not a fad or a passing phase; treat it with respect" - Elizabeth Manning   

It has taken me some time to figure out what to say and how to say it because it isn’t easy to say, but I feel like it is something I need and want to talk about. I want to talk about my personal experience, issues revolving around my sexual identity, and my faith. There is a lot to address with this topic and I don’t plan on talking about it all in one post because each topic deserves it’s own post, and right now I just want to be open.

What does this mean? Bisexual activist Robyn Ochs described it perfectly “I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”

I decided to be open about my sexuality because I needed it for myself. I wanted and needed to express myself openly and fully, and talking about my sexuality is something that is important to me because it is a part of who I am. Another reason is because I have thought, prayed, and felt prompted to be open about being Bisexual. I have gotten a lot of anxiety thinking about being closeted and it has caused me a lot of grief and just the thought of being open is burden lifting! I am sure many of you are asking why am deciding to come out when I am married to a man and I am LDS, but let me just say those two factors doesn't change my sexuality. The gender of my partner doesn't change my sexuality; I am Bisexual no matter if I am in a relationship with a boy, girl, non-binary person, or I am single. My faith doesn't change my sexuality, either. In fact, it is one of the reasons I want to be open because Bisexual Mormons do exist, they are real and I am one of them! 

"Bisexuality is misunderstood by both the gay and straight community—and is even less understood in the Christian community where sexuality is often limited to binary straight/gay and male/female."

I want to be able to help those in both communities, the Christian/LDS and LGBTQ community to come to better understand bisexuality and that it is possible to be a part of both communities (Christian and LGBTQ). There is a lot of problematic views, stereotypes, biphobia around Bisexuality and I want to help educate and break those stereotypes and by doing so, I felt it would be helpful by coming out. The first person I told was Ariel, after we were married, and he was supportive and did his best to be understanding of me. I was finally able to be who I was meant to be and I was able to be open to my significant other! And having him be there for me and not think any less of me, was such a blessing. He truly has been so supportive during this transition of accepting who I am and I am forever grateful for him. My family, has also, been supportive and accepting of who I am and I am thankful for them and their understanding. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me and accepts me for who I am, for He is the one that created me. I know that I am not any less worthy of His love just because of my sexuality, and I am thankful for knowing this. 

There is a lot more I want to talk about, and I will, but for now I just wanted to be open and briefly express myself because this is something I needed to do for my own well-being.

 Please, let me know if you have any questions for me (email: and know that I am here for those who are coming to accept themselves, I know how hard it can be.

 “I hope as a body of Christ we can dedicate our lives to reaching out, serving, welcoming, and providing resources for all people, especially those that are the most vulnerable among us. This is the hallmark of a true disciple of Jesus Christ.“ - Anonymous